Now this is getting ridiculous . . .

I said I liked purple vegetables, but this is getting ridiculous.

Purple artichokes. Baby purple artichokes.

I can’t even find them listed in my gardening books. Nevertheless, there they were at Whole Foods. Artichokes no larger than a San Marino tomato, covered in deep purple-black leaves. Sitting in their bin staring at me, just daring me to buy them.

Waiting for me to chicken out.

You see, I can’t cook artichokes. I can cook just about anything else, but I fail at artichokes.

Your boat has just two burners in the galley? No problem, I can whip up a five-course meal. Forgot you were hosting a holiday party for 50 people? Don’t worry, I can create a buffet with at least a dozen different offerings. The holidays roll around, and I set up an assembly-line and solo-bake batches of ten different cookies in less than one day. I collect cookbooks and recipes, and when I get bored, I’ll pull them out and try something new. I have yet to meet a cuisine I didn’t like and couldn’t cook.

But I flunk Artichoke 101. I have literally stood in my little kitchen, watching a Youtube instructional video on how to cook artichokes, only to have them turn out either teeth-breaking hard or a spongy, soggy mess.

However, I am nothing if not persistent, and so I bought the baby purple artichokes. I clipped the leaves, simmered and steamed and — well, they weren’t a soggy mess, but they weren’t the most appetizing things I’ve ever eaten.

I take heart from the fact that at least this time, they were edible. I think I’m getting better at this artichoke-cooking thing. Or maybe it’s just that baby artichokes are a little easier to prepare. Either way, I plan on trying again, to see if maybe, with more intense practice, I’ll actually be able to cook tasty vegies instead of soggy mush.

Oh, and like just about every other purple vegetable — the baby purple artichokes turned green when cooked.

Surfing the Star Wars Universe

The wonderful worlds of George Lucas’ Star Wars are a total jumble in my head.

Star Wars, and in particular the Jedi, are a bit of an obsession for me. George Lucas created a world that is ever-expanding at an ever-increasing pace. Fans were sucked into this universe with the first trilogy, accompanied by comics from Marvel and a couple of books, but once the trilogy completed itself, things — stopped. The story seemed over and then, almost tentatively, a book was released that picked up after Return of the Jedi. And then another book, and another, and next things fans knew we were being run over by a veritable onslaught of novels to read. Not just single books, but trilogies, and linked stories, books for adults and for children.

George made another three movies, chronicling the fall of the Old Republic and the rise of the Empire which Luke and Leia and Han defeated. I know that some people hate the new movies; others love them more than the originals. Me? I’m an equal opportunity fan — I adore the classic simplicity and design of the original movies, while cheering the ornateness and broad range of aliens in the prequels. Truth be told, I may be slightly more fond of the prequels — heresy, I know, to many, but hey! There’s a lot more Jedi swinging lightsabers during the romanticized Old Republic era — and as you can tell from the name of this blog, I love pointy things and romance.

Now, of course, with Disney taking the helm of Lucasfilm, fans are promised six or more new movies, another TV show, and yet another expansion of the Star Wars Universe. While I decry the slowdown in the creation of new action figures (hey, Hasbro, I want more Jedi!), I cannot wait to see where Star Wars goes from here.

Meanwhile, as I said, I am a devoted Star Wars fan. In my hunger for new stories, I read fan fiction — there are some lovely, epic-length sagas out there. I have even been known to write the occasional story of my own, in a genre that can only be described as ‘crack’ or ‘cracked’ (how else to classify a story in which Ewoks drive — and crash — a Senatorial pod?).

My desks and computers are guarded by Jedi action figures, while I not-so-secretly plan how to turn my somewhat unartistic talents to making figures of the Jedi who have yet to be modeled by Hasbro. And yes, I am one of those fans who lobbied for an action figure of Jocasta Nu. Gotta love the librarian.

Most importantly, I’ve read all the books and most of the graphic novels that expand on, and fill in the gaps of, the existing movies and the Clone Wars TV shows, so that the narrative created by Mr. Lucas never ends. It seems a new novel comes out every couple of months. Fortunately, I’m a fast reader.

I am, though, also a bit of a confused reader. I’ve read the comics and books as I got to them, not as they came out — and not in any particular chronological order. So I jumped from Luke wandering the galaxy with his son in search of the lost Sith tribe back to the pre-Republic era of Revan and then forward to the adventures of Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi. I cruised through the rise of the Empire with Darth Maul and then surfed back and forth between the battles of the Clone Wars and the battles against the Yuuzhon Vong.

My head is a giant bin filled with names, places, events and relationships, and while I know who goes where and why, I feel like I’ve missed something in my scattershot approach to reading the novels. So, for relaxation, I’ve decided to start re-reading the novels in chronological order. Fortunately, there’s a list so I don’t have to go crazy trying to figure out what juvenile book fits where between the adult and graphic novels.

I’m in no particular hurry; I’m doing this because I want to savor, slowly, a world I fell in love with years ago. I’ve started all the way back at the beginning with, fittingly, the latest book, “Into the Void.” I plan to read for at least 30 minutes a night, just to relax. Thirty minutes, for me, can translate into several chapters. Wonder if I’ll reach the end of the Universe before the end of the year?

Do you know Mr. Toad?

So, can anyone identify the mysterious Mr. Toad shown below?

Last Friday, two co-workers and I were among the last people to leave our offices for the long holiday weekend.  It had been raining all day, and when we got to the parking lot, we found Mr. Toad waiting for us:

mr Toad

The picture really doesn’t do him justice.  He had a wonderful, brilliant green face — and a defiant, belligerent expression.  Which makes more sense if you see where we spotted him:

standoff

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, that’s him.  Right under the bumper of — and in a standoff with — my co-worker’s SUV.

We walked up next to him and he just held his ground.  We aimed cameras at him and he didn’t bat an eye.  My co-worker started her car, and despite the roar of the engine over his head, he didn’t give up an inch of pavement.  For long minutes he refused to yield — and when he finally moved, where did he go?

Further under the car.

Fortunately (through courage, good sense or sheer terror), he held still when the car backed up, and as we left the parking lot and headed home, I could see him in my rear-view mirror, still hopping around in the puddles.

We have a parking lot that is bordered by a strip of mixed trees and bushes, and through that wood flows a tiny stream.  As a result, we have wildlife — deer, groundhogs, voles and mice, the occasional skunk or garter snake, a resident fox and numerous birds.  But this is the first time I’ve ever seen a toad — or is he a frog? — anywhere in the area.    He (or she) may have ventured out in search of food, or perhaps the poor thing was driven out because the stream was overflowing its banks (the first time I’ve ever seen it do that).

It was a lovely gift of Mother Nature and made us all laugh as we headed home.  Now, if only I could identify his species.  I’ve had no luck finding that face in any online databases of wild animals.  A trip to the library may be in order this weekend.

Meanwhile, let’s all admire the courage of Mr. Toad, who faced off with a behemoth SUV — and lived to hop another day.

Where did all the bunnies go?

I’ve only just now noticed — where have all the rabbits gone?

I spent this Memorial Day weekend wandering around the Philadelphia area, thinking deep thoughts and making a few key decisions on where I want to go from this point in my life.  Much of that was done while walking in the woods, in fields, along the rivers and creeks of the area.  I saw a lot of wildlife.  What I didn’t see was the usual spring glut of fuzzy, brown bunny rabbits feeding on new grass and clover.

I passed massive numbers of whitetail deer, including two absolutely adorable, wobbly-legged spotted fawns trailing behind their mother as she fed her way across a meadow of mixed grasses and other greens.  They kept getting distracted by everything they saw, stopping and staring wide-eyed at everything in their path, then skittering quickly to mother when they realized she’d gotten farther than 6 feet away.  And I was impressed by a buck at the Wildlife Sanctuary — his antlers, covered in soft velvet, had already grown taller than his rather large ears, promising to be a spectacular set of antlers by autumn.

Every lawn I passed, including tiny patches of grass along the highway, sported its own groundhog.  I watched red-tail and Cooper’s hawks circle in the sky, while every tree, bush and spike of tall grass had a red-winged blackbird, variety of sparrow or cardinal perched in or on it.  I heard owls hooting and woodpeckers tapping deeper in the trees.  At night, I held my nose while skunks wandered around my apartment complex — I have to admit, they are cute, as long as you don’t need to breath.  And last night, as I stopped at the local library to return my books, I came face to face with a pair of red foxes.  The smaller one sat down, demurely tucking its tail over its paws, while the taller one stood nearby, watching me as I walked back to my car and then drove away.

There are enough squirrels running around to populate an entire city.  Enough said about the rats with furry tails.

Then, this morning, I once more carried a box turtle across the road by the Sanctuary.   I’ve had to do that at least two dozen times every year for the past five years.  I’m not sure if the Sanctuary has a lot of turtles — there are many small streams and large ponds dotting the landscape — or if this is the same turtle every time, hitchhiking to its destination.  Either way, I simply can’t leave it (him? her?) in the middle of the road to be run over.

And as I placed the turtle in the grass on the other side of the road, it suddenly hit me.

There are no rabbits.

Three years ago, I couldn’t keep the fit-in-the-palm-of-my-hand baby bunnies out of the garden at work.  I had to drive slowly along every road, because there was always a rabbit charging blindly out of the weeds into traffic.  I could walk the Pawlings Road trail along the river in Valley Forge Park and see a dozen or more in a quarter-mile stretch of pathway.

And now, there are no rabbits.  None.  I can’t honestly recall the last time I saw a furry bunny bounding along the road, ignoring me while I cursed them and yanked my car into the other lane to avoid hitting the silly rabbit.

Is it my imagination or are the rabbits now — endangered?  We have a good supply of foxes and hawks, both of which seem to have adapted well to suburban life and probably relish a good meal of bunny rabbit.  Have they been run over by so many cars that the population has dwindled?  Or is there something else going on?

I never thought I would say I mis the rabbits — but I do.  I really do.  Silly rabbits — come back!

Let’s Try This Again

Well.  Let’s try this again.

I’ve made some adjustments the last few weeks, to give me more free time to accomplish the things on my list — including blogging.

So we’ll try this 111 days of posting again.  Starting today and going another 110 days out, we end at the day before my birthday.  I’ll be concentrating primarily on my career and fitness goals, with some remaining green spring cleaning and general reorganization of life added into the mix.

On with the fun.